New before/after: "The Master's Chair"

Today's before/after is "The Master's Chair," a fantasy adventure from Mackenzie Morgan and the first book in the series "The Chronicles of Terah."

The biggest problem here was...bigness. :) When you're writing your blurb, watch out that you don't get too involved in back story. Keep it short, but not too short. Stick to what the reader absolutely needs to know to understand your story. Everything else is extraneous.

Here's what Mackenzie and I did. (My biggest problem writing this one is that I consistently misspell "sorcerer" as "sorceror.")

Before:
Since the beginning of time, two sister worlds, Earth and Terah, have coexisted in different planes, surrounded by an immense field of energy. Long ago, magical and non-magical creatures lived together in harmony on both worlds, but as life on Earth evolved in the direction of science and technology, the use of magic deteriorated and soon magical creatures and sorcerers became the subject of myths and legends. Meanwhile magic flourished on Terah, and as sorcerers became more powerful, they became more influential, and soon they were the heads of government. The Council of Sorcerers became the ruling body, with the chairman, the Master Sorcerer, the highest human-held position on Terah.

When Master Sorcerer Badec realizes that his unborn son, Myron, will be his one and only heir, he protects the child from his enemies by arranging for him to grow up on Earth. Myron is scheduled to be returned to Terah on his twenty-fifth birthday, at which time he’ll learn who he is and begin to study magic as well as everything else he’ll need to know in order to assume his role as Terah's next Master Sorcerer

For twenty-three years, things go as planned, and Myron goes about his life as Kevin, a typical nerd, who is more comfortable with computers than with people. Then Badec becomes quite ill and the decision is made to bring his son home early.

One morning Kevin is an accountant living and working in Omaha, and the next he is in the middle of a field with six complete strangers, surrounded by huge stones and a forest. Before the day is out, Kevin learns that he is actually a sorcerer named Myron and that he’s next in line for the Master’s Chair. While he’s still reeling from that bit of information, he finds out that due to his father’s illness, he has a little less than one year to learn enough about sorcery to be able to defend his life and chair against sorcerers who have been practicing their craft longer than he’s been alive.

Welcome to Terah.

To read more about The Chronicles of Terah, go to www.mcknzmorgan.com.

After:
Badec is the most powerful sorcerer on the parallel world of Terah. But the position of Master Sorcerer comes with many enemies, so many that when his only son and heir is born he sends the baby to be raised on Earth.

His son Kevin grows up to be a nerdy accountant, more comfortable with computers than people. So when he suddenly finds himself transported to Terah, where magic is the norm and technology is unknown, it's a bit of a shock. A bigger shock: Kevin discovers Badec is his father, and that he's a sorcerer himself.

But Badec is dying. Kevin has less than a year to learn everything he needs to know to take the Master Sorcerer's place. If he doesn't, he may lose both the Master's Chair and his life.

Want me to help with your blurb? I can do that.